It can be difficult to discern the difference between enabling and helping but the fine line exists that can be critical to the success of an individual in seeking help for addiction. Anything that makes life easier for an individual with addiction is likely enabling. Helping is truly supporting the individual to seek help for addiction and behaviors. Learn why enabling is not helping and how to make necessary changes if it is happening.
Secrets to Helping
The secret to helping a loved one with addiction is simple. Stop helping the person with addiction. This may mean looking at the actions which are helpful and those which are not. THe lines may seem blurry but it is helps to differentiate between the two, especially if children are involved. One thing is clear. If a family member or friend is doing anything more than that person’s fair share to help the individual keep getting high, drink or use drugs, that person is enabling.
It is as simple as doing nothing but it is also not quite that simple when it comes right down to it. Even if an individual does endure anger, screaming or the silent treatment for stepping in when a person with addiction acts out or uses, it is better than sitting by while the individual continues to destroy their life. The person can get high and have responsibilities taken care of or apologize and not do it anymore.
Loved ones who struggle with addiction are not easy to deal with and family members are often in the cross hairs. When a person struggles, it is in the best interest of all involved to create positive boundaries to help life be more manageable and make changes. When that individual can get to a place where it is necessary to decide enough is enough, that individual will then seek out help.
When it is Time to Help
When the time comes to help a person with addiction, it will become evident. When a person with addiction asks for help to get sober, the right time to help is right then. The promise of getting clean will not be there in a few days or weeks, it is right now. When the person wants help right away and cannot go on living that way, it is a good time to step in and assist the individual into recovery. Explain this is because of strong love for that person and their well being while still keeping boundaries. The best way to help a person with addiction is to let the person know what help is available as long as recovery is an option.
The Villa helps individuals who are seeking to recover from addiction with information and resources for the journey. Contact us if you are seeking to help a loved one recover and we will provide some steps to help you get started.